5 Things You Don’t Say to Adoptive Families


I‘m over at Mom it Forward today with my thoughts on how to phrase questions you have for adoptive families. 

I also share a special thank you for the people who treated the adoption just like you would a new baby coming home from the hospital. It meant the world to Brian and I to have that support!

Momma T - The heart takes us places we never dreamed. I always just tell everyone we have beautiful miracles. everyone of them. Aren’t they wonderful and so unique.

Mary Thompson - Love the words and wisdom.

kate.eschbach@gmail.com - Thank you, Becca! I’ll have to look up that video! Thank you for being a foster parent!

kate.eschbach@gmail.com - Thank you, Meg! It’s quite a journey – isn’t it?

kate.eschbach@gmail.com - Thank you, Hope! I just love catching up with you through blogging after all these years!

Hope - I love the way you worded this…since I have only and only intend to foster/adopt older kids we tend to be much more forthright, I had never thought of it coming from a younger child’s perspective…okay, maybe I had. But in any case, you are so right, paying attention to who has ears on the conversation makes the biggest difference.
In my experience most adoptive families are happy to share their story…but the audience and circumstances certainly matter.

meg - Love these and how you respond to them. I did a post like this a while back but mine was more sarcastic at times and definitely not as peaceful as you answered!!!

becca h - These are great Kate! I know sometimes people are well meaning, but the way things come out can be terribly offensive! We are now foster parents and it’s incredible the freedom that other strangers feel to say things to me! If you haven’t already seen it, there is a hilarious video out re: “if you wouldn’t say it to someone about their breast implants, you shouldn’t say it about adoption.” A great laugh, but so unfortunately true! Thanks for helping give constructive things for those really interested in hearing our children’s stories!