Brian and I have been married almost thirteen years.

We dated for five years and were friends for two years before that.

(My goodness – I sound ancient right about now, huh?)

A few months ago, I put on facebook that we were giving a ‘marriage discernment’ talk for our high school teens at church. I received questions such as:

• What is a marriage discernment talk?
• Your hair looks cute! Did you go blonder?
• How do you keep your marriage happy and healthy?
• Are they serving pizza after? Or subs?

For this post, I’m going to concentrate on ‘How do you keep your marriage happy and healthy?

(Now, so you don’t keel over in suspense… Yes, we fed our teens pizza and yes,I went blonder)

1. Go buy the book The Five Love Languages and read it. It’s ok if he doesn’t read it. It’s ok.

You can always read little snippets that you like to him as he brushes his teeth or as you have him kidnapped in the car for long road trips.

2. Realize that when you feel like you are giving 80% and he is only giving 20%, there is an entire world of things you are forgetting about.

For me, a few of those things are – he cleans the pool, even when it is 118 degrees outside, he takes the trash to the  curb – every single week, he makes breakfast for us, he fixes my pillows every night before I climb into bed.

Take a minute and write down the little or big things that he does to show love.

3.  Today, compliment him on one of those things. Show him that you notice!

4. Edify and encourage! We have to be each others biggest fans.

When you are speaking to others about him, share the good things. Build him up as the rock-star that he is.

5. Hold hands, give him a back-rub. Show him that you love being next to him!

How do you keep your marriage happy and healthy?

Have a great week,

Kate