Disclaimer: I was invited to a complimentary media screening of Paramount Pictures’ new movie INSTANT FAMILY.

As I sat in the theater watching Instant Family, scenes from our own adoption journey kept replaying in my head. The further you walk  into the world of adoption, the more you realize there are 31 flavors. There is international or domestic, open or closed, designated, special needs, foster-to-adopt, and many other beautiful and complicated versions.

Our flavor is a Designated Open Domestic Adoption. We met Riley through friends and became his guardians and eventually his adoptive parents. It also means we stay in touch with his birth family. Every family defines ‘open’ a little differently. His great-aunt is part of our family. She treats all five of my children as if they were hers by name and blood. I tease her that she adopted all of us.

I was so encouraged to see a movie that portrayed what adoption can really look like – the carnivals, the excitement, the awkwardness, the hard conversations, the tears, the do-overs, the meetings where you cannot relate to the person sitting next to you and their motives for adopting but you love them anyways.

Since our adoption journey was so incredibly backwards, we had many moments that we felt a little lost as we navigated the paperwork and what came next. I remember having very few people to talk to that could really relate to what was happening around us. Movies like this can pave a way for understanding and acceptance of adoption in our society.

I remember when my husband and I were in college. He was a waiter and it was as if they had their own secret language – ‘in the weeds’ and ‘corner’ and other things they would yell at each other.

This movie cracks open the world of foster care and adoption and lets everyone have a glimpse into what it is really like. It gives you part of the playbook that many of us on this journey are up late at night studying. I hope you go and see it! It was incredibly well done!

Also, this wonderful lady – she just about stole the show! She completely reminded me to a mix of my mother and grandmother. To this day, they have an ongoing joke with Riley and they holler out ‘My Riley’ when they see him.

Many films today focus on conflict and glory and battle and sacrifice in exciting, but shallow ways. Instant family goes deeper, and tells a richly human tale. It is a tale worth seeing.